What is most important?
Welcome back!
I have neglected my blog for a few weeks, not because I wanted to, more because I was stacked with a project which took up far too much my free time.
I have always believed in doing whatever is needed in order to get job done. That collective team togetherness, working under pressure, can create amazing results. Perhaps for a few days it is ok, but when the past 5 weeks of your life have been systematically taken over by something else it becomes far too much, even for me!
I am a perfectionist, I am creative, and I personally feel responsible for the work I do. My parents drilled into me that level of responsibility and so I generally will do what it takes to get the job done. Sadly 100 hour working weeks are way over-rated and as that was the culmination of 5 weeks of intensive work I can honestly say now, was it worth it? The job got done, by all accounts it was considered reasonably successful. I got to work with some great people with a real “can do” attitude. I managed to get my team of people motivated and working in unison for a common cause. On the face of it, I should be proud of the achievement.
You see for every hour outside of work I spent on that project, I spent another hour away from my wife and my home. Having moved to Australia together, she shouldn’t have gone without her husband for that amount of time. I enjoy our time together, and for the small amount of time I was at home, I spent most of it complaining about the project. The past 5 weeks have put a tremendous strain on our marriage, no reward, financial or otherwise was worth that strain.
My boss spoke about how impressed he was with my performance, and that my work was beyond exceptional, but was it really worth having to work to that level, under that amount of stress, and putting both myself and my wife through all that?
Quite simply the answer is no, regardless of how impressed many people are/were with the project, personally for me I am quite sad that what is truly important in my life (wife & family) were relegated whilst something else took priority for 5 weeks of my life. You cannot put a value on time, those 5 weeks are lost, never to be replaced again, no praise, money or time off could account for those lost hours.
Part of the reason I left the UK to move to Australia was to get the whole work/life balance correct, having nearly worked to the point of mental and physical exhaustion I can honestly say I never want to be that involved with a project ever again, life is too short, and quite frankly I don’t get paid anywhere near enough for that.
So rather than thanking the countless people who actually made the project a possibility, and there are a lot of thank you’s needed, instead I would like to say sorry to my wife for not being around much the past few weeks. I work to live, I work so I can enjoy a good life with my wife, for us to enjoy our time together. I’m sorry the past few weeks have not reflected that, and only hope I never have to do this again!
Love ya babes
